I'm sure y'all see all my updates and things and I'm in a mood right now. Sometimes you gotta do things you don't want to do. I hate to see anyone else going through a situation that they have the power to change. I always want to offer advice but never tell anyone what they should do. I took alot of things into account when i first started writing this note.
i don't live in a fairy tale world. I don't boast or brag about anything that's not going on. I really truly have had a some great times in 2012. I've had a roller coaster of emotions come over me this year. I have felt like i was the luckiest woman and I've felt like i was the being taken for granted. I want to send a message out to the fellas:
Fellas if you have a woman who can see past anything in your past and accept what you are and where you are trying to get to appreciate that woman. there are too many women out here giving away there body and soul for a couple of minutes of pleasure or some monetary bullshit. I'm 35 and i don't have time for that shit. I have a job i have children i have responsibilities. I rely on no one but God for anything. when i woman says i will hold you down and she shows you...you need to spring into action and do whatever you can to keep her happy. She needs to feel what you feel. SUPPORT. She needs to know there isn't a woman in the world that can make you walk away from her. She NEEDS to see some action...let me repeat ACTION. You can have the gift of gab with these hoes a real woman ain't gonna fall for that. She might not say it out loud but TRUST she is watching, listening and waiting for you to SHOW her you are real.Its hard out here right now. People losing jobs, families falling apart, and people are losing their mind. This isn't the time to be SELFISH in any relationship. If you truly LOVE TRUST RESPECT HONOR AND APPRECIATE that woman SHOW HER or you will lose her and her trust and respect.
I'm a strong beautiful black woman. I hurt, i bleed, i get angry, i pop off, i vent, i sing, i cry, i write, i love, i nurture....what i don't do is play a fool for anybody. It's not in my DNA. I really truly wish this year was ending on a better note. I was supposed to be planning a wedding right now. I was supposed to be celebrating an anniversary in November. But just like that POOF. Spell was broken...I'm not perfect but what i am is real. I take full responsibility for not cutting this madness sooner. But love is a powerful drug. Not wanting to give up and not wanting to see failure clouded my impulse to just walk away. We shared some great days and some special nights...that person was there for me at the toughest times of my life and that showed me this wasn't fake. It just may not be the right time. Maybe God wanted us to be... i needed him and he needed me. One of us lost their way. If God see's fit maybe we will have another chance to get it right..maybe its the end. Who knows. Fellas i hope you received this. I typed this with no tears in my eyes and no hate in my heart...i found love and i don't regret one minute of it.