Let the music play...music is power

With the departure of Prince I thought it was within my musically driven mind to share with you a few r&b songs that will forever move me. It's so many more but i'll post 4 artist/songs that get me in my feelings. I hope you enjoy them all and remember to listen to the lyrics... it's poetry in motion.

1. Prince - Most beautiful girl in the world. 

Growing up i wasn't the most outgoing person and i pretty much stayed to myself and did what i had to do to get through school work and everything else. Didn't have a daddy around to tell me i was beautiful. So this song reminds men that it means everything to a little girl/woman to have the man in her life tell her how beautiful she is. Listen to the words.

2. Shanice - Yesterday

Ever been in love and didn't want to let it go? Well Shanice made me understand you can't hold on to things that hurt you in the past. Everyone does not deserve a second chance. Sorry not sorry. Listen...

3. Glady Knight, Brandy, Tamia, and Chaka Kahn - Missing You

This song holds something special between me and my sister and mother. My sister is still here on Earth but if she wasn't I would miss her and carry on like she would want me to. My mom will always be my big sister girl. Sisterhood is so important. We have to stand strong together in this world of craziness. Listen..

4.  Mariah Carey ft BoyzIIMen - One Sweet Day

This song is just confirmation to me that we have to know we will meet our loved ones again on the other side. My one sweet day was when my mom told me she was proud of me (she always told me) but a week before she died was most important because she also said i did a great job trying to manage my life and my issues. She knew i would be okay. I love my momma. I'll see her again.

5.  Fantasia - Lose to Win

I love this artist because she performs like she is the only one in the room. Annointing comess in teh secular world too. In life you cant win them all and you have lose alot of things before you win the race. I cried when i first listened this cd. She left her heart on this one.

Bonus 6. Mary J. Blige - Take me as I am

I'm a Mary J fan from beginning to end and this song almost tops them all. No more drama and My life are both my faves. Take me as i am or have nothing at all... i got alot of flaws but i deserve a love that embraces all of me and vice versa.

No Closure

Greetings everyone, 

Haven't visited this blog because i moved everything to Wordpress when all the business was going on about the sexually driven content here on blogger. 
I see myself shutting it down on Wordpress because I'm not one of those popular blogger who people can't wait to see post. I feel like I'm talking to myself most of the time anyway.

I have had a okay year. full of ups and downs as usual. Been trying to change a few stripes though. I'm trying my best to be open to different things lately. I often wonder if people even see the change. I have done better with hiding my feelings around certain people for their sake. That's not my thing.

What i am going through at this time in my life may be normal for some people but not for me. Who knew living right and doing right would turn into lifelong battle for me? Who knew being overcome with love and happiness would put me in a shell? I know I didn't but that's the way the cookie crumbles over here. Sad to say I share a lot of blame.

I really want people to realize losing my mom was very devastating to me. I still needed her. There are things that I didn't get to ask her. I still don't know what the hell I'm doing with these kids but dammit I'm winging it. I see so many take for granted that they still have the opportunity to learn and not judge their mothers. I am a mother so i know the many reasons why my mom had to do what she had to do. Still these thoughts don't fill the voids that overwhelm me from time to time.

Closure seems to be a word that comes across my brain in relation to all these things i don't understand. Whether it's relationships and friendships. I don't think I've done one thing to anyone that I haven't tried to explain my reasons and/or apologize. If I'm wrong I pray someone comes to me and corrects me. I hate when someone has something against me and they tell others instead of me. Thats an act of an coward.

I have closed myself up so tight that I haven't been in a relationship in 3 years now. I miss love. I miss the excitement of dating. I miss long walks and stolen kisses. I just have to be careful in who I give my attention and my secrets too. Everyone cannot handle the things I come with. Life is crazy y'all. I'm gonna keep living and loving those who want it. Thanks for stopping by to hear me whine... it's been real. 

Blessings, 


Lykebudda

As the Budda Flows I & II Available!!!

The wait is over my friends it is ready to be bought and delivered to you in many ways. This project was special to me because I out my pen down a lot of times and lost my way since I've started this. Thanks to my kids for the time they had to watch me fussing because I couldn't get the font or margins right. I have to say a big thanks to my girl Kali for the editing and the book cover. She is one in a million.

This group of poems are personal and transparent. I opened a few windows and closed a few doors in the process. I am sure you will notice that this is deep and somewhat heart wrenching for me. Over the past year a lot of sadness has surrounded me. The curtain has been lifted it slightly and I'm ready for what's next. Grab your copy(s) and please feel free to leave a review when you are done. I greatly appreciate it.

You can grab your copy of my book(s) at the following links:
Lykebudda: Windows to my soul - Createspace (paperback) $8.00
Lykebudda: Windows to my soul - Amazon (paperback) $8.00

Windows to my soul - Amazon -(kindle version) $4.00

As the Budda Flows is still on sale for $3.00 on All three links below:
As The Budda Flows - Createspace (paperback)
As The Budda Flows - Amazon (paperback)
As the Budda Flows - Amazon Kindle version

That Love...

That mesmerizing I can feel you when your gone type of love,

 that rock me tonight

 and wake me up before you go go kind of love, 

that grab me hold me and caress me type of love

, that I can't think breath or function without you love, 

that endless timeless blind sighted love... 

That unexpected love... 

That love

Lykebudda 2014

You got the right one.....

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So people been giving K. Michelle grief about this song but it is my absolute favorite song by her. All her songs have hella emotion attached to it. I don't really care for the singing for the money type folks. You should be able to relate to what you are singing. "Fuck you and all that, blast me on Twitter and imma blast back" she wrote that from the heart. This video speaks volumes...might be petty but she got her point across. You have messed up with the wrong one and you will live to regret it if you come for me. Most cheaters, deceivers, and side pieces need their ego toned from time to time.

Yeah the lyrics are "ratchet" but it is what every woman is thinking when some lame she used to love tries to make a fool of her. He knows she is way outta his league and he came up just being chosen by her. The ones he chose to play around on her with thought they were achieving some great feat cause he had a go getta girlfriend and still knocking off the ex-gf, baby mamas, and groupie chicks. No you little peons....he picked the right one. The one who wasn't gonna lose sleep, income, or anything else without him. You need validity. She doesn't. He needs to have many women to be important. He faked his ambition, drive, and maybe his love for her. He lost one. This song made me want to blog. It don't have to make sense to you. *smirk*

Thrusting - Throwback freestyle (2011)

Drippin Budda

Thrusting ya thick manhood

Into my pulsating punanny

Making it sing

Releasing the cream

Wetting the sheets

I’m grittin my teeth

I’m fighting back screams

I want to keep you going

Deep

Deeper

Slow down the pace

Peek up at the expression on my face

Throwing it back polishing your tool

This milky budda with render you senseless

Defenseless

Bust and cuss

Fuck, I can’t feel my legs

Don’t worry baby

As I push ya back and give you some head

The taste of my love

Is such an acquired taste

Fuck around and get a sweet tooth

It’s addictive they say

My budda love will drive you insane

You shall commit and do as I say

I’m just clowning and free styling on this rainy day.

~Lykebudda @ 2011~

My Day.. Saved again ~ Day 31

The day I get saved again will be a day to remember. I have gone through some things this last two years. I have lost my way tremendously. I embraced some things I clearly should have let pass me by. I acquired some things I can't shake. I increase my pain and didn't chose my intuition over my trust. I have failed my heart and increased my stress. I have not honored my God in a way to be proud of.

I'm ready to get back on track. Not cause I've hit rock bottom. Its because it has to be done or all these many words and phrases and pages won't mean a thing, if I don't get back right with the one who had given me the tools to do right and I took my eyes off the manual. I'm testifying for me. Its my day. Its time to turn it back around. I'm giving myself back to the almighty.

Well done... Day of Days 30

Day 30 ~ My proudest day

Sitting here i can't say i have met my proudest day. Graduating high school, having my first baby alone, raising both them together, staying employed and independent, writing and publishing my poetry, walking away from many unhealthy relationships...the list goes on.

The proudest day for me in the future is seeing my kids turn to be productive people in this crazy mixed up world. Me knowing and them knowing i went the extra mile for them. Witnessing them not making the same mistakes i have in this life. I'm so proud of them right now i'm getting teary eyes as i type. *Deep breath*

I will be so proud if I leave this life and leave my mark as a honest person who didn't hold back when it came to saying and being who i am supposed to be. I got a story to tell but I'm not ready to share. Throughout this story I have seen god work it out for me By the minute, the hour, the day. Isaiah 41:10 is the quote I'll refer you too.  If God see the best in me I need no other persons approval period. I am proud of the woman I have become.

Done... Budda approved :)

Just Chillin ~ Day of Days 29

Day 29 What did I do today

I actually slept til 11 a.m cause i had been at the hospital with my mother all day the day before. she had to have surgery done for some kidney stones and I wasn't gonna have peace unless i was there with her. When i got home I had to feed my kids and get in their ass for the house being a mess. All with heavy eyes. By 10:30-11 i was done. Fell asleep fully dressed and woke up to my son telling me i was sleeping in my clothes. I made a few calls checking on my mom because she was discharged home and i wanted to make sure she was comfortable. It was a very uneventful day that i was thankful for cause I am of course on vacation and supposed to catch up.

Fight No More ~ Day of Days 28

#28- the day you had your first fight. why?

My fellow bloggers believe it or not never have had to lay hands on nobody in childhood or adulthood. Verbal fights yes...physical nope unless it was with my sibling and it didn't go past one of em getting mugged in the face. See my brother was the school bully and we were one grade behind each other so no one would touch me because of that clown. Verbally I am an assassin I will scare your ass out of a fight with me. I can fight but I guess it just never gets escalated to that point. I know its been a couple of fellas and ladies who prolly would have loved to snatch my weave off one time but the didn't do it. Nope only fight i'm in now is maintaining my life...that's enough for me.... Fighting for love is overrated to me right now.

This song is in my head after typing this...

Day in my life... Day of Days 27

#27- a day in your life (explain an average day of yours)
Alarm at 6am breath, stretch, shake and moan... awake my little bunnies for school and beat them in the bathroom. Try to get a cup a joe in (never do) Kiss the kids and head to the bus stop for the 7:05 a.m. 
Get to work close to 7:30 am punch in on my desktop and go grab a egg white omelet from the cafeteria (every other day). Listen to my coworker cackle bout there night or hubbies and put my earphones in my ears cause I really don't care.  That's me 2 days after New Years on the picture below.

when i get off work at 430p im usually talking on the phone with my kids as she makes her way home and I'm on the bus on the way also. Come home chat it up with my kids check over their homework and start dinner if i haven't sat down already. While dinner cooks I browse FB check IG and Twitter feeds. The kids have abandoned me by then. Eat, get my workout clothes on (3x a week) get 45 min in then shower and relax. I do try to put a hour or two into my book with a few stops here and their when i get frustrated. I usually end my night with a prayer and maybe a few tears. I got a few things going on and I'm usually a little misty after I know my kids are settled in. Nothing god can't handle for me. I'm not in the bar too much nowadays and when i do go its usually karaoke or a somewhere where they sell good food. 

My day isn't filled with streamers and confetti but it is mine im just plain old Angie... thanks for reading.

Gone and Neva coming back ~ Day of Days 26

#26- the day someone left and never came back (not death related)

I don't know how to answer this without referring you to the blog about the man about the dog about the deception about the neglect about the disrespect about my sticking my neck out bearing my soul ignoring his flaws absorbing the blows of the judgement of the distrust of the aggravation the migraines the stomach pains the fuss the ending that was near the resistance the love whispered in my ear the stalling the pleads the sudden departure the lock...i threw away the key and let the lying dog lay down and keep his damn fleas.

that's all i got decipher it if you will.

MF tell em what i said 

Just winging it ~ Day of Days 25

Day i'm planning for...hmmm
I was planning my wedding for this year but that dream tanked, thank goodness i was just doing it in my head. I plan on just going where the wind blows and doing any and everything to keep my spirits up.

I plan to make sure my kids are covered in case of anything going awry...you just never know when God is ready to take you home. I'm planning on moving out of Cleveland soon as I can afford it and my son is out of high school. I really am not planning for any special day. Just the normal everyday thing us humans do...just lliving life everyday.

I plan on releasing another poetry book but there is no set date cause im working on this one with extra special care. If you guys would like to purchase my book feel free to go to this link As the Budda flows to purchase... a fan of Amazon go to As The Budda Flows - Paperback and for you E-book-ers  As the Budda Flows - Kindle and may others just search the book title and my name. I plan on spreading my love to those who appreciate it.

a memorable summer day - Day of Days 24

Last summer there was a concert all old school  hip hop artist Chubb Rock, Doug E. Fresh, Whodini, Christopher Williams, DJ Pooh, and many more. When I say I felt 16 again and had a ball with my girls. I'll post pictures i can find...i really cant remember who else was there but it was nice summer day. i'll dig through my IG for the pics 

Christopher Williams singing Dont wake me I'm dreaming 

Cleveland Flats skyline 

Micheal Baisden was in the house 

damnit i cant remember his name 

matching outfits lol

Overdue ~ Day of Days 23

Brandon 

My 21st birthday...Welp lets just say it was uneventful except for some Braxton-hicks contractions. I was actually due to have this little man above on November 25, my birthday is November 24th. Besides sitting at my grandmothers house who i lived with worrying about her i did nothing but eat. She had been admitted because she had issues with her colon and they decided to keep her. Yeah what a bummer. I was already having issues with my blood pressure so i didn't go far from the house except to work. They restricted my hours and made me go on maternity leave the week before. I don't remember most of that day maybe cause it was no big deal to me at that time. I was alone, pregnant, and i couldn't stand the father at all. Nine days later i gave birth to Brandon...my true first love after a difficult labor. He was my present. He is my strength. He gave me a reason to believe in love... Not your typical 21st birthday gift. Here is my gift below at age 15.

2 weeks old 

15 yrs young 

Pole dancing w/ the girls Day of Days 22

Day #22 a day with the family you'll never forget

A day with the family you will never forget. A few weeks ago me and cousins went on a road trip to Detroit/Pontiac Michigan to celebrate my cousin birthday. We usually go up there anyway this time of year cause there are two birthdays and plus we like to kick it up there anyway. The itinerary was to go to pole dancing class first and baby i was ready to hop back on that pole. (no pun intended) Our instructors name was Jennifer aka Juicy and she was fabulous. It was about 10 of us there and we all didn't have a shy bone in our body which made the class fun and easy for the instructor. 

Our next stop was a karaoke bar/dinner club whose name is escaping me right now (maybe because the manager was an ass) We never got to eat only half our party received their food and the response to why was "This isn't a banquet hall" yeah it got ugly after that. But it didn't ruin the evening. Just wont be visiting that establishment again. Our family that stayed in Detroit had to figure our next move cause we were hungry and ready to party. We went to this club called 4 Brothers and they club owner took good care of our entourage food drinks and we tore up the dance floor. As always my family and my friends that came along had all eyes on em and showed Detroit what Cleveland ladies bring. 

We ended the night around 4am and went back to our hotel to rest. Usually before we drive back we go to my cousin Mary house to chill and talk but i decided to head back with my girlfriends so another person could ride with my cousin. I actually loved getting away even for one day. sometime i need to get out of my shell and have some fun. I forgot all my issues that day and just let loose. I love when we just get up and go. I'll never forget and i plan to repeat that trip again. Pictures are below.

In love with a Strippa ~ Day of Days 21

#21- the day you met your most recent/or last love

The man above is my ex-fiance Bashaun. I called him Bae cause that's his name. His alter ego Mr. Deep is below. We actually met around 2002 at a male revue he was preforming at. I was only there cause my bestie at the time was the barmaid and i get lit for free. ( Thanks Carla and Christine's bar)  At the time i wasn't looking for nothing. It took him a while to even get my number. We just messed around off and off with lots of time in between til we got bored with each other. Yeah he was just my bed buddy. 

Fast forward 9 years November 11,2011(THE DAY)  he finds me on what Facebook and we start back chatting and after a few weeks he decided that he was tired of being out here and wanted to settle down. The first day we had a date I made dinner cause i wasnt in the mood to go out. We had dinner, laughed talked about the old days, and of course memories came flashing back and next thing you know... we making passionate mind blowing love. Funny thing we both are so quiet afterwards it was eerie. (cant listen to Trey Songz  ever over dinner). We just had the best chemistry ever and it never died down. I'm going on and on but that was the first day of our new found relationship. 

A few weeks later later he asked me to marry him and i feel in love all over again. 

Enough of that... he will always have a part of my heart and i wish him luck doing whatever makes him happy. Reason, season, lesson or lifetime. Unfortunately he FUMBLED.

Drawing a blank Day of Day 20

#20- the most memorable day of your childhood

 Growing up i was always around my brother Deon and my sister Theresa. We used to make up games and keep each other occupied. I cannot remember anything specific I just know it was with them. Playing any bounce in the street and flag football in the snow was awesome to me. My mom really wasn't focused on us when she got divorced from my dad and moved back to Cleveland. We always were in school, had a roof over our head, and she was there when we left for school. Guess this is why i hesitated to post. Glad I had my siblings and still have them now.

--------->next 

Saturday Luv ~ Day Of Days 19

#19- your favorite day of the week and why

Saturday is my favorite day of the week...why you ask? Cause it's my off day i get to keep my pj's on and not wake up at the crack to get my kids and up and to go to work. I don't kick it too much so I'm not planning outings. If my kids aren't home its my day of solace. I write i cry i meditate i do me. The kids are usually occupying there time watching TV or playing their games. It's chill day for me.

It's been real Jacobs Field ~ Day of Days 18

#18- the last day of your first adult job

I worked for the Cleveland Indians - Sportservice Inc from 1995 til 2002. I started my last year of high school. It started out as a seasonal job but i really worked all year round even in the off season. I had some great years with that company i actually was pregnant with both my kids during my time there. I started out as a stand manager and after a few years and being robbed by a few non-profit groups i had enough and wanted to get out the food/sports biz. I was making good money and plenty overtime there so i was good. I got promoted to a vending commissary manager on the first deck which was big cause it rocked in my section. I had grown to know and love my vendors (they tipped hella good) but i was the mother of two and i still hadn't got into the field i wanted to be in which was Medical. The off season of 2001 i was attending school for medical assisting and i was determined to get through it. My midterms were in the middle of a home stand so i called and let our Human Resources/ secretary know i had to call off to study. I received a call back regarding my request and i was told that i would be replaced during the home stand and would come back as a vending commissary attendant. 

I had worked and sacrificed too damn much of my time, health, and represented them fools to the fullest for them not to support my schooling. Beside our ticket sales were down cause the recent departure of Manny Ramirez and a few other key players. I'm like I'll be down there in an hour. I brought them my uniform, my keys, my badge and anything else they had given me and i resigned August 2002. I didn't say bye to anyone i just walked away. I had time another job working for the Cavaliers so it was no biggie. I still worked there up until being hired at my current place of employment September 2002. Its been all good since then. I still run into people i used to work with there and they asked why i left. My response: They didn't support me advancing my education and i dare not work for anyone who does such. There is no guarantees in life when you allow your dreams to sink due to fear.